Milliana

When I was in Kindergarten, we had this awful class pet millipede. I was still in that crappy bossy stage- which carried on all the way through third grade until someone actually managed up the nerve to tell me that I was “really nice, but bossy”- and of COURSE, I just HAD to name this millipede. So I named her Millie (OH SO CLEVER!!!). Now that I think of it, we weren’t exactly sure whether or not Millie was a boy or a girl. Oh well.

I learned to read at age three-and-a-half, and learned to write- no, MANAGED to write- at the ripe age of four. Even before I could complete the alphabet in the correct order (which took almost a year to master), I had loved creating stories. I remember when I was four I created this gorgeous masterpiece: (note from the author/editor: I'm still figuring out how to post pictures on this blog, so I'll just describe it to you. It was a badly drawn stick figures with these badly draw letters written at the top: AVLI... the rest is illegible.)

I think it was supposed to be about me. Or some random girl. I think.

By the time I had managed actual words and could form coherent sentences, I had begun writing stories of my own. 

When Millie the millipede arrived in our little classroom at the end of the hallway on the left, that name inspired me to write a story about a girl, just like I had before in my earlier years (or at least I THINK it was about a girl). It took quite some time to brainstorm, but halfway through snack, a lightbulb lit up in my brain. 

Milliana! To a six-and-a-half year old, it was ingenious. Milliana became the key character in every free-write, and she continued on with me throughout first grade (and made her surprising return in third!). I think in one of the Milliana stories I actually dedicated it to “My brother Samuel”- who only went by Sam- “my mom and dad, and”- wait for it...- “my Kindergarten class pet Millipede Millie.” There were many more spelling errors, but you get the point.

In “Milliana Goes to France Eiffel Tower”, an enlightening yet thrilling seven paged story in which Milliana climbs the Eiffel Tower in less than five minutes, Milliana gets a French boyfriend named Biscotti. I was playing around with names, and I thought, Oh, that sounds French enough. I wasn’t actually aware that it was a yummy Italian cookie, but thought it was just a made up name.

That all changed in first grade.

I went with my mom to a nearby cafe on Main Street. There were selling these cookie bread things in a jar for just 50 ₵ a piece. I stood tiptoe on my childrens’ size 12 slip-on Chuck Taylors as high as I could and peeked over the little jar sitting on the counter. And there I saw it, right on the label: 

Biscotti: 50 cents each.

It was like some sort of wizardry that blew my little mind.

They had gotten into my Milliana books! I thought. AND they named a cookie after them? I was astounded- it was just too much to process. 

“Mommy?” I asked in awe.

“Yeah?”

“Did they read Milliana?”

“What do you mean?”

“Biscotti’s her boyfriend!!!”

She laughed when I said that. “No, Ella. That’s an actual cookie! Looks like you came up with the same word they did!”

I could feel my face burn red. I had basically built the entire past two years of my writing life off of Milliana. I felt as if all my work had been for nothing- actually, not for nothing. All of my “work” was to have a main character in my story named after a cookie. A COOKIE!

Actually, Mom bought me one a year later and I hated it. But I like it now (Sort of). Anyway, I moved on. On from Milliana, and all her mediocre and completely unrealistic journeys. But, if you are skeptical, I have actual, living proof of Milliana-  spelling errors added. And as a sidenote, I switched on and off from “Bisotti” to “Biscotti”.

Remember me? Milliana! Remember our last adventure, going to Egapt. Well, that was only fun, but this is going to be even funner! Well, were going to the Eiffel tower! I’m a teenager now, so i can drive. finaley I’m old enough to go alone! Um, so w-hi, captain speaking. Were landing now! Oh, my, gosh! Let’s go!

I walked over to the, “car renting-station”. I rented a car. I drove to the hotel, and a very nice man showed up. he showed me around my house, showed me a couple of good restraunts, and I had a WONDERFUL night. Oh, by the way, his name is Bisotti. hee, and he even called me madam!

But before I went to sleep, I studied the pictures on my wall, and guees what? When I saw the Eiffel tower, I said, “I want to go to the top!”

The day came. “Ohhh! helllloooooo, Morning,” I said. “I’m Ready for a new day.” Time to get dressed. Bisotti came. “Oh hi Biscotti!” “Hi, Milliana.” “Would you like to meet some of my friends to lunch?” “Why, yes” said MIlliana.

They got into the car. Bisotti said, “Bonjor, Milli, we our going to a famous french restrant.” “very nice, very nice,” I said. “for pizza?” “Yes,” said Biscotti. “Here we are!” he said.

“Douse, Loise, Dale, Anna, meet Milli.” “hello” I said. “PIZZA!” we all said. “Let’s go!” And mmmm........ that pizza was SOOO good! and then I rememberd- Eiffel tower. “Hey! Guys! ya’ wanna’ go to the top of the EIFFEL TOWER?” and this is what they said- YEAH!

Good thing I have my rope! Let’s climb! To the Eiffel Tower!

Climb, climb, climb, wooh! This is hard work! One more step....

Suprise! There was a big party at the top. Biscotti and Milliana were happy together.